All on all if your worried about ruining their relationship just walk away, but in the end its up to them to sort out of they are best friends they should be able to accept the other dating you even tho they are best friends, issues will always arise it isn't fair for you to have to give up your feelings just cause they both like you, but like I said earlier its your choice whether to walk away or pursue the relationship.
New here? Already a member? 240772 questions, 1063722 answers Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? New . Most . . . . . . . Two guys who are best friend both like me. I feel guilty for coming between two good friends!
What should I do? Tagged as: , Question - ( 27 January 2007) 1 Answers - ( Newest, 28 January 2007) A female age 26-29, anonymous writes: Boy #1 and Boy #2 are best friends, both completely besotted with me.
For one I cant understand it, I dont feel amazing, even when they tell me so. I'm best friends with Boy #2, and I dated Boy #1, which really made Boy #2 sad. After a little while I dumped Boy #1, because there was no 'spark', that excitement when you kiss. I didnt think it was fair on him, so I quit it. But now I'm starting to regret dumping him, and I'm getting paranoid about him liking one of my friends instead of me. The fact that I went out with Boy #1 started to get between Boy #1 and Boy #2's best friend relationship, and I feel guilty about getting between them.
It's confusing me so much that now I'm starting to feel sexually attracted to Boy #2, even though he's NOTHING I'd ever go for. I think I'm just a tease, I so dont want to be though. Am I just, y'know, randy? I dont even understand my own actions! God. Help me? View related questions: • • • • • <-- Rate this Question A female reader, , writes (28 January 2007): Calm down you must take a breath and relax because you have to figure out everything have you ever heard of the saying having what you can't have?
i believe it somehow gets to this point...after you dumped Boy #1 you believe that you can never have him again which makes you want him.... I'm not sure whether your with Boy #1 or Boy#2 right now and i'm not sure whether you are still best friends with either of them but you must figure which one you like I believe the reason why you must be getting a bit confused is because of lack of communication you must tell Boy#1 and Boy#2 that you feel guilty and sorry that you effected their relationship..at least you might feel a bit better Still i think that you should just let them both go they will be able to patch their relationship up after awhile as long as you give them both some time and while their doing that you can relax and just get them both out of your mind • • • • • <-- Rate this answer Add your answer to the question "Two guys who are best friend both like me.
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best dating 2 guy who are friends both like me - My Friend and I Confronted the Guy Who Was Texting Us Both
Consider the positive qualities of each guy. The next time you're around each guy, make an effort to really engage him and to think about what it is you like about him so much.
Though you can't always pin down the complicated feelings that make you like a person, it's important to have as much information as possible when you make such an important decision.
Ask yourself the following questions when you talk to each guy: • Does he make me laugh? Does he have a good sense of humor? We're all attracted to people who can make us laugh. Guys with a good sense of humor make us excited and cause us to look at the world in a different way. If he tickles you, is it weird or do you like it? No guy should touch you in the obvious places unless you are ready for that, but like a hug around the waist, holding hands, or even his arm around you is okay, but if you're at the stage where he is going to kiss you and you kiss him back, make sure that you are ready to be at that stage.
When he kisses you, be sure you know how to kiss. You don't want it to be awkward. The guy you are going to choose needs to be able to restrain himself. • Does he seem curious about other people? Is he interested in things outside himself?
Guys who are only interested in themselves can be pretty boring. You'll want a guy who has hobbies, friends, and a good perspective on life.
• Is he in touch with his emotional side? Is he sensitive about other people? Lots of guys have an emotional side; the problem is they don't want other people to see it. A guy who's okay with other people seeing his emotions is a guy who's both confident and mature. • Does he flirt respectfully? Basically, the ask question boils down to this: Does it seem like he likes you for more than just your body or just your looks? Are the compliments he gives you more than just about your body?
• Does he take things slow? Guys who take things slow like to savor things. They care about getting every last drop of enjoyment out of being around you. Guys who are moving at the speed of light are often onto the next girl faster than you can say "letdown." Consider how each guy makes you feel.
This is just as important as thinking about what you like about each guy. One guy may look better on paper and may have all of the qualities that you're looking for, but the other guy may have the ability to make your heart pound just by sending you a text message. So, the next time you're around each guy, think not only about why you like him, but ask yourself if he makes you feel confident, happy, giddy, and like a better person.
Here are some things to consider: • How does he make you feel when you're around him? Does he make you feel like he's only interested in you, or does he seem like he flirts with other girls all the time, and you're just another girl on his long list?
• Does he bring out the best in you, or is he okay with you just being "okay"? • Does he challenge you and make you want to be a better person? • Does he compliment you in a way that is meaningful and not forced?
• Does he make you blush, giggle, and feel like a giddy little girl? • Does he treat you like a lady and make you feel special? Consider the negative qualities of the guy.
Though you may only be thinking about all of the great qualities of both guys and about how they both give you butterflies, you should also consider the negative aspects of their personality or lifestyle to get more clarification.
If you're serious about making this choice, then you have to consider the pros and the cons of being with each guy. Here are some things to consider as you make your decision: • Does the guy have a lot of baggage?
Does he have a complicated past and a slew of emotional issues to deal with? Sure, you may have fun with him, but is that something you want to be responsible for in the long run? • Is he bossy and manipulative?
Does he always try to get his way, or is he incapable of admitting he's wrong? These are serious signs that he's probably a little selfish, and signs that you might get more than you bargained for in a relationship. • Has he lied to you? You want a guy that you can trust, a guy who's not afraid to be honest with you, regardless of how much the truth hurts.
Guys who like gossiping and starting rumors probably don't care much about other people, meaning stay away from him. • Does he constantly get in trouble, either at school, with his parents, or with the authorities?
Bad boys may have a certain sexiness about them, but chances are if they're constantly distracted with shenanigans or hijinks, they won't have any time to be around you. • Does he still talk about his ex-girlfriend? If he's still talking about his ex, dropping in little hints from time to time, or constantly talking about her, that's a bad sign. It doesn't mean that he's a bad guy; it just means that he still loves her.
Consider how each guy feels about you. If both guys are completely devoted to you, then you have a tough task on your hands. Though you shouldn't go with the guy who likes you more just because it's a safer choice, you should consider how important you are to each guy, and what it would mean to him if you stopped seeing him. If he would just shrug it off and then move on to the next girl, then he's not the guy for you.
If you think one of the guys likes you much more than the other, then this should play a strong part in your decision. • You don't have to ask outright. You can get a sense of how much guy feels about you just by the way he looks at you, by how often he wants to hang out, and by how much he talks about a future together.
• Of course, if you're just looking to have fun with a summer fling or to get some dating experience for a few months, then you don't have to care so much about whether the guy sees you as long term potential. Ask your trusted friends for their opinions. Your friends are there for a reason: they offer shoulders to lean on, provide examples of how to behave, and give you advice when you need it.
Take their advice, but with a grain of salt. You're making the decision at the end of the day. Remember that you're not asking them to help you pick the "better" guy, or the guy that they would pick, but that you want them to help you decide what's right for you. • Don't ask, "Who do you like better?" Ask, "Who do you think is better for me?" These questions will keep you from getting suggestions about who your friends would date, instead of who you should date. • Be open to their suggestions!
If you have your mind made up about who you want to date, there's no use in asking your friends about their opinion. If you ask them for their input, be ready to follow it. Weigh their similarities and differences in a list. This will help you see what you really wanted in the first place. How does each one make you feel? Make a list of what you really want in a guy and don't. Do a pro/cons chart about each guy's strengths and weaknesses.
See how this pro/cons chart lines up with the list of what you want out of a guy. Here are some other questions you can ask: • Which guy will treat me better? • Which guy will be there for me through the tough times? • Which guy do I have more in common with? • Which guy's face will I always want to see at the end of the day? • Which guy will get along better with my friends and family?
• Which guy can I not live without? Trust your gut. We can't pick and choose who we like. We're born a certain way, and we eventually develop likes and dislikes. Don't overthink things. Trust what your gut tells you about these guys and go for it. Flip a coin in the air. Tell yourself that if it lands on heads, you have to go with Guy A, and if it lands on tails, you have to go with Guy B. While the coin is in the air, where do you instinctively want it to land?
That's your answer. • If you know one guy is bad for you but can't help feeling attracted to him (and don't really like the other guy), take a break from both guys. Not being in a relationship really isn't bad. In fact, it's much better than being burned. • Learn from your mistakes.
If you've dated a certain guy before and the relationship ended poorly, don't make the same mistake all over again with another guy. Even if you feel attracted to him, what's the use in going through the same thing all over again if it caused you heartbreak and misery? Don't rush it. Don't feel like you need to make a decision right away. Your decision could take some time. During that time, hopefully, one of the guys will do something good or bad to make the decision much easier for you.
As long as you haven't committed to either guy and don't feel like you're being disloyal to one guy by hanging out with the other, then you should take some time to make the decision.
• Just don't drag it on too long. If you pick one guy, but he finds out that you've been hanging out with another guy for the last few months, then he may feel slightly hurt or confused. Commit to the guy you've chosen. Once you've made your decision, stick to it.
That doesn't mean you have to tell the guy, "Hey, I chose you over Guy A!" That won't make the guy feel very special. The commitment is something you make through your actions and your heart. Work on building a healthy, stable relationship with the guy you've chosen -- and only the guy you've chosen. • Get ready to start dating and hanging out with only the guy you've chosen. Enjoy the benefits of being with one person without wondering what another guy is up to.
• If you feel empty or incomplete without the other guy, then it may either mean that you made the wrong decision or that you never liked the first guy that much in the first place -- you only liked the chase. • Be friendly to the other guy, but don't go out of your way to hang out with him or do stuff alone together. If you're overly friendly with him, he might think that he still has a chance.
Plus, it might get the guy you chose unnecessarily jealous. Be prepared for the aftermath. Know that choosing between two guys will affect your relationship with both of them. This is the double-edged sword of relationships: chances are good that you're going to break the other guy's heart, and miss out on a relationship with him. If the guy you don't choose doesn't know about the first guy, you don't have to make it a big deal or give him the real reason why you're ending your "relationship." Though you should be happy once you've made your decision, know that the seas may still be a bit rocky.
• Know that you may turn guys against each other. What if both guys are best friends? What do you do then? If you choose one and the other likes you, they'll probably stop being best friends.
If you want to avoid this situation altogether, date someone else instead. • Be prepared to lose the guy that you didn't choose. He may not want to be "just friends" after you hung out romantically or flirted with each other. But that may be for the best.
Accept your decision. Life is yours to live, and you deserve to live it the way you want -- while trying to hurt others as little as possible. Though you may feel guilty for making the decision, you and the two guys are better off once you've come to terms with your feelings. Be proud of yourself for making a mature choice instead of leading two guys on forever. • Don't be afraid of making mistakes as long as you learn from them. • Don't worry about having everyone like you; when you're making a big decision like this, feelings will get hurt.
If you are starting to get annoyed and stressed with the "Who do you choose?" or the "When will you choose, hurry up," just pick someone else entirely. There are other fish in the sea, and nobody should put pressure on you to decide things like this - and by trying to choose, you are only making things hard on yourself and may upset them.
If you can't choose, then look at how each guy views you. Though this isn't about who loves you more, it should say something. If a guy is mildly interested in you or it's just you, and the other goes out of his way to walk with you in the hallway, you need to let that play into your decision. You don't want to get hurt by the first guy because he never had feelings for you but you chose him anyway, and you don't want to break the second guy's heart simply because you can't let go of the first guy.
If you truly loved the first one, the second one would have never came along. If you’re having trouble choosing between two guys, think about how each one makes you feel and how they feel about you. Then, try to picture how you would feel without him in your life. Imagine yourself being with each of them -- does one guy make you feel special?
If so, he might be the better choice! If you've thought about both of them and you still aren't sure, keep in mind that this isn't always a logical decision. Sometimes, the best way to choose is to follow your heart!
I had this problem once. Actually more than once. But the first time was when I was 9. These two boys, who were best friends, both liked me. I liked both of them as friends, so I’d hang out with them, playing sports or music or whatever kids do. Then I fell in love with one of them. My first love. I still love that boy, although I haven’t seen him for nearly 30 years, and we are both grown now. The other boy really liked me, but I just didn’t have the same feelings for him. We stayed friends, but not close friends.
He didn’t come to my house as much, and I never went to his. The boy I loved was always over, or I went to his house. He’d walk me home and kiss me under the tree in our yard. If you like both boys, why not date them both? As long as everyone knows about it, it’s fine. If you just don’t want to hurt one or both, then you shouldn’t be dating either one. You’re not ready for a relationship. Relationships require honesty and communication. Be truthful with both of them and ask them both if they are ok with seeing you while you are seeing someone else at the same time.
If not, it might help to sort one of the connections into a platonic one and you can pursue the available one or you can explore the connections with both men until it becomes untenable to someone to do so.
WHEN YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON YOUR BESTFRIEND