As an introvert, dating can be hard. This is especially true, when you are dating an extrovert. For those in a similar situation, here are some tips for .
You may have found yourself attracted to that outgoing, sociable cutie you see around sometimes. Maybe it’s their energy or the way they seem to be always on the go.
Perhaps you first noticed them in one of their rare quiet moments. Whatever the case, they have sparked your interest. Now you want to date an extrovert and you wonder how to get their attention. What do you do to get an extrovert to notice you? Then once you have their attention, you may want to know how to keep the relationship going.
If you want to date an extrovert you need to take the right steps to attract one. Then find balance and maintain your identity. Get out and socialize. Extroverts like to go places, meet people, and generally be out and about in the world. You’re not going to attract an extrovert by sitting at home.
If you want to attract and date an extrovert you’re going to have to get off the couch and go socialize, too. • Attend parties and other events that your extrovert might be interested in.
• Even if you don’t see them there, you’ll have something to talk about when you do get together. • For example, if you hear that your extrovert is attending a mutual friend’s birthday party, you could, too. Use social networking. Extroverts are active on social media because it allows them to share their life and keep up with what’s going on with their friends. There are lots of ways you can use social networking to attract your extrovert.
• Social media can help you learn more about your extrovert. For example, their posts and check-ins can give you clues as to where they like to hang out.
• Your profile and the things you post are a way to let your extrovert get to know a little about before you actually meet. • Tag your extrovert in a post or two. They might like the recognition and attention. Be yourself. This gives your extrovert the chance to get to know you and all the great qualities about you. Don’t try to act like someone you aren’t to date an extrovert. They will find out and won’t like that you’re being fake. Attract them by being yourself. • If you need to, make a list of your qualities.
Be sure to list personality traits, hobbies and interests, and skills you have. • You list might include qualities such as: hardworking, great cook, creative, attractive, organized, good at lacrosse, etc. • Remind yourself of all your great qualities and just act like yourself when you are around your extrovert. • For example, say to yourself, “I’m charming and friendly.
I can just be myself right now.” Show your confidence. Acting confident around your extrovert will help attract them to you because it will make you more noticeable and more memorable.
You don’t need to be over-the-top or change who you are, but showing a bit of confidence will help you date an extrovert. • Hold your head up, relax your shoulders, and stand up straight. • Look around you and look people in the eyes instead of looking at the ground when you are in public.
• Smile and greet people in a clear and calm voice. • For example, when you see your extrovert, stand up a little straighter and hold you head up. Look him in the eyes and in a clear voice say, “Hi! How’re you doing?” Start a conversation. Extroverts like to meet new people and are known for being talkative and asking questions. Starting a conversation will help you attract and date an extrovert. It will also give you the opportunity to get to know one another. • For example, if you see your extrovert at the local café, go up to them and ask them how their day is going.
You might say, “Hey! How’s your day going so far?” • Start a conversation about current issues or things going on in the community. For instance, you could try, “What do you think about the presidential debates?” • Use the conversation as an opportunity to get their contact information if you don’t have it. You might say something like, “I know you have places to go.
What’s a good way for me to get in contact with you later?” Communicate honestly. The key to dating an extrovert is the same as the key for dating anyone — honest communication. Talking with your extrovert will help you understand each other better and find the things you have in common.
It will also help you prevent and overcome any misunderstandings. • Extroverts like to talk a lot, so make sure you are actively listening to what they tell you. • At the same time, make sure that you express your feelings when you disagree or something bothers you. • For example, you could say, “Can we talk about our plans for this weekend?” • Ask your extrovert for their input and opinion just as much as you tell them what you want and need.
• For instance, you might ask, “How do you feel about stopping by the party for a while and then the two of us go for pizza?” Socialize together. Extroverts like to get out and do things. If you are dating an extrovert you will have to accept this and also socialize with them. You don’t have to hang out with them every time they go somewhere, but you should plan on socializing together.
• Volunteer together at a local community organization or for a charity event you both support. • Go out on a double or group date. Or hang out with a group. For example, you could join a group for bowling or a game night. • When you are hanging out with others remember to give your extrovert time and space to interact with the others in the group. An extrovert gains energy by conversing with many other people, so they may not want to spend all their time in one spot, talking to one group.
Accept that you might not have their full attention when you are out with others, but it doesn't mean the introvert doesn't like you or isn't interested in you. • For example, if you all are at a party, give your extrovert time to work the room and greet people. Spend time one-on-one.
Although extroverts are social people, they also need quiet and peace sometimes. When you date an extrovert make sure that you are spending one-on-one time to balance the time you spend time socializing. Spending time with just the two of will also give the chance to get to know one another better.
• Do something that doesn’t involve other people. Plan a quiet night at the movies or dinner at a cozy restaurant. • Spend some time just talking with each other, getting to know one another.
For instance, the two of you could take a quiet afternoon walk. • Be careful, though, because too much one-on-one time can bore an extrovert. Try doing one ‘quiet’ activity for every two or three social activities. Plan a surprise. Extroverts like meeting new people, going new places, and trying new things. When you date an extrovert, plan new and exciting experiences for them.
This will let your extrovert know that you understand them and their energetic lifestyle. It will also give you also something to talk about during your one-on-one time. • For example, if your extrovert mentioned zip-lining then plan a surprise trip to your local outdoor adventure park.
• Or, for instance, you could plan a surprise dinner party to celebrate your extrovert’s promotion at work. Engage in self-care. If you are not also an extrovert — you may be an introvert or simply less of an extrovert than your partner — you will need to take care to make sure you are getting the alone time you need to recharge.
If you find you "recharge" when alone, as opposed to when you are around other people, plan some "me" time to make sure you don't get burned out or resentful of your partner. You don't need to keep up with their social lifestyle.
You can let your partner know you need some time to yourself in order to enjoy going out with them. Let your partner go out while you stay home and take a bath, read a book, watch a movie, or do something else that helps you feel replenished. • You might say, "It's important to me that I have at least a few hours each week when I can be by myself and recharge. You go ahead to the party — I'm going to stay at home and do a little reading. We'll catch up later!" • Just as the extrovert paying attention to other people isn't a reflection of their feelings for you, let them know that your need for some alone time isn't a reflection of your feelings toward them or your relationship.
Assure them that it doesn't mean you don't like them or don't want to spend time with them — this is simply how you take care of yourself. Develop your own interests. There will be times when your extrovert makes plans without you or you need to take some "me" time or simply don’t want to participate in what they are doing.
Having your own interests will make it easier for you to date an extrovert because you won’t be dependent on them for all your entertainment. • Spend time doing things you enjoy like drawing, writing poetry, swimming, or gaming. • If you’re not sure what you enjoy, then make a list of things you’ve been wanting to try. • Pick two or three activities off of the list and give them a shot. For example, you might want to try rock climbing or meditation.
Be secure in yourself. Extroverts are friendly, chatty people. Just because they are super social doesn’t mean they have eyes for anyone else. Instead of being jealous and thinking that your date is flirting, accept that your extrovert is a social person and be secure in yourself. • Trust that your extrovert is into you and only you because of all your great qualities.
• Tell yourself, “He’s dating me because of my great personality, good looks, and the way I make him smile.” • Remember that meeting new people and socializing are two of the big traits of extroverts. It doesn’t mean your extrovert is flirting. • You might say to yourself, “She’s talking to that guy, but she’s here with me.
I don’t need to be jealous.” Spend time with your friends. It can be easy to get caught up in an extrovert’s world —spending time with their friends, going places they want to go. While you are dating your extrovert, make sure that you are still keeping in touch with your family and friends. • Schedule time to spend with your family and friends.
For example, take an afternoon or evening for a family meal every once and awhile. • Invite your friends along sometimes when you and your extrovert go out.
• Do things with just you and your friends. For example, plan a girl’s night out without your extrovert.
best dating an extrovert girlfriend - 10 Struggles Of An Extrovert Dating An Introvert
The other night, my boyfriend and I both took the to “find out more about ourselves” because we’re into that kind of thing. I wasn’t even a little bit surprised by our results – my boyfriend was declared an extrovert, and I was declared an introvert. We get along great, but we’re opposites in many things, especially when it comes to our personality. So, when Ashley wrote about what it’s like to be an , I knew I had to write the same thing, from a different perspective. Most days, it’s hard enough to be an introvert alone… it becomes just a little more difficult when you’re dating someone with a very extroverted personality.
My boyfriend can go to a party, and immediately make friends and feel at ease. I, on the other hand, take a long time to warm up… if I ever do at all. This is just one example of our many differences. What’s it like to be a quiet girl dating an outgoing person? Read on to find out. Here are 15 things you’ll only understand if you’re an introvert dating an extrovert. 1. They don’t always understand when you just want to relax and do nothing. They get super antsy when sitting quietly for too long.
2. Trying to explain that you need a little space for yourself once in a while comes off as insensitive and insulting.
When really, you just can’t function without having you time on a regular basis. 3. Every time you guys go to a party together, you end up feeling like your quietness is holding them back from having a great time.
Even though they insist they don’t mind keeping you company. 4. You two often disagree on social plans. No, you don’t want all of your friends to join in on your dinner date. No, he doesn’t want to stay home on a Saturday night just to chill. 5.
In the beginning of your relationship, they thought you weren’t even interested in them. It’s not your fault! You don’t like making the first move! 6. Sometimes their outgoing personality is overwhelming and exhausting. But you would never tell them that. 7. Other people are always surprised that a reserved girl like you is dating such an outgoing person.
Cue eye roll. 8. Their friends don’t get why you’re so quiet. They always think you hate them, which results in you thinking that they hate you. It’s complicated. 9. Your S.O. encourages you to be a little more open – this is actually really helpful.
Sometimes you need that. 10. In social situations, they’re so talkative that it takes some of the pressure off of you, which is nice. This is one of those times where they are truly your better half. 11. You often feel jealous of the way they can instantly connect with people.
It makes you feel sad. 12. They get frustrated when you act shy around their family or friends, and then you feel guilty.
But it’s honestly just really difficult for you to make those connections. 13. They often get overwhelmed by how much you think. 14. …But they also help you relax and just have a good time when you need it. 15. In the end, you actually appreciate all of the differences because you both balance each other out really well.
It may not always be easy, but it definitely is always interesting. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Are you an introvert dating an extrovert? Can you understand all of this? What did I forget? You can follow the author, , on or . Follow Gurl! , , and Extrovert here. The article is really funny but I don’t agree with it. I get the feeling it’s written about extrovert women dating introvert men vs extrovert men dating introvert women. I don’t feel frustrated when my gf isn’t talkative, I honestly don’t even notice.
I don’t get offended when they need alone time because I’m able to amuse myself quite easily. The only thing I get frustrated with in terms of dating introvert women is that they get mad and imply vs telling me why they’re upset. The guessing game I suck at so it pisses them off even more •
Ironically, this also applies to human interaction. Sometimes opposites are needed to function, but the balance between human relationships is much more complex than the natural balance of elements.
Opposites attract—yes that’s true—but it’s not without difficulty. One of the most common forces of attraction that comes with trouble is when an introvert and extrovert fall for each other. Two opposite worlds collide. But with the right balance of each other’s differences, you can create a beautiful equilibrium.
When an extrovert ends up with an introvert, it can be frustrating to get the balance down at first. Just know that even when it feels like it may not be working out, sometimes all it takes is time. Here are a few feelings you may have dealt with if you’re an extrovert dating an introvert: 1. You want to branch far out to explore new adventures, but they want to stay close to their comfort zone. What seems to be the number one problem in introvert/extrovert relationships is the difference between motivations.
The extrovert wants to live on the edge, try new things, see new places, and meet new people. While the introvert likes to go to the local bar they’ve grown to love, or just do something low-key. It may be frustrating but the extrovert must accept the introverts needs if they care about them. It can be really hard for people to break out of their shell, but this comfort in a relationship comes with time.
And you may even be pleasantly surprised of what the introvert may want to try. 2. You feel like you’re giving too much and they’re not giving enough. This is one of the hardest obstacles to deal with. While one person might pour their emotions out and wear their heart on their sleeve, the other bottles it up and hides away from the world. This creates an emotional disconnect. The extrovert can be easily led to believe they are giving their all to the relationship and not receiving enough in return from the introvert.
Patience and understanding is key. 3. It’s like pulling teeth to open each other up. With the introvert's bottled-up emotions, sometimes it can be a difficult task to pry them open. It is known that extroverts thrive off venting, while introverts would rather ponder their thoughts with alone time. This disconnect between two people in a relationship can leave the extrovert feeling lonely and the introvert feeling pressured.
Sometimes it results in both completely shutting the other out. The best thing to do is address it ahead of time and work out a communication plan.
Give each other a specific amount of venting time so that it’s equally balanced. This will allow for the introvert to open up, while the extrovert won’t over-pour. 4. You may not always be on the same page. And this is perfectly OK. You don’t always have to be on the same page, but you must always read a page from each other’s book. It is normal to not understand each other, and that’s fine because as time goes on and you get to know each other better, that will blossom naturally.
It’s the patience, understanding, love, compassion and acceptance that will successfully lead you to that point. 5. You handle dealing with emotions differently. While these differing personalities may balance each other out, sometimes they can clash. If one person is an emotional wreck, and the other rarely shows emotion, you must learn to accept that about the other person before you decide to commit.
You can’t punish the other person for their emotions and how they handle them. Acceptance is important. 6. The significance of alone time.
is so important, no matter how extroverted you are. This obviously comes easy to the introvert and may frustrate their partner, but when it comes to stress and anxiety, alone time can be good for mental health and personal well-being. And most importantly, good for a relationship. You know what they say— absence makes the heart grow fonder . What’s difficult about dealing with this is realizing the point of which is too much seclusion of the introvert.
It is important for the extrovert to give them space, yet make sure they are not feeling neglected. It’s a difficult balance for sure. 7. Sometimes confrontation is good, but sometimes it’s bad. Confrontation is a tricky subject when it comes to this type of relationship. When conflicts arise, just like all other relationships, you must handle them carefully. When people have similar personalities, it’s easy for them to learn how the other responds to conflict situations because they know the feeling.
In introvert/extrovert relationships, the difference in how they respond to situations takes time to get used to. Sometimes confrontation can be healthy for the introvert, but sometimes it breaks them in a way that forces them to isolate and bottle-up even more. Managing this balance with compassion and understanding is really all you can do. 8. It is important to handle confrontation lightly.
According to , the solution to handling conflicts is to “take a page from the other’s playbook.” The article stresses the fight-or-flight instinct of the introvert when the extrovert may go into attack mode. “Extroverts tend to be “confrontive” copers, while introverts are more likely to withdraw at the first sign of conflict.
This can leave introverts feeling harassed, and extroverts feeling stonewalled.” It is recommended to count to ten, calmly and respectfully, before raising issues. “A raised voice will likely make it harder for an introvert to listen to what you are saying; her fight-or-flight instincts will be aroused. Introverts need to understand that locking horns can be a sign of respect, and even love.” 9.
Compromising is key. Opinions, wants and needs are all bound to clash at some point in a relationship, because, well, nobody is perfect. But with an introvert/extrovert relationship, compromising is the key to success. You can agree to disagree without breaking each other down. 10. Respect their space, but don’t give in to neglect.
According to , one of the most important tips for the extrovert dating an introvert is to respect their rights, but never give up your own. “Being respectful of your partner’s needs, however, does not let them off the hook for respecting yours. You are entitled to say sometimes, “It’s important to me that you come to this party,” or, “I understand that you need solitude, but it’s not OK with me for you to spend every evening alone in your man cave.
We have to find a compromise." And compromise is a two-way street.” And when it comes to all of the different relationship scenarios contextualized by the holidays, I've been through it all. During high school, I've experienced the cliché yet romantic New Years kiss before, naively thinking "Wow.
The person I'm starting my year with is the same person I'll end my year with too" only to eventually get dumped via text right before the school's winter dance and Christmas. During my junior year in college, I went on what I'd like to call a double date baecation (and yes, I meant baecation instead of vacation) right before Christmas.
This year for Christmas I'll be in New York with one of my best friends getaway girl's trip which will probably result in getting drunk at Times Square and reminiscing about all the interesting things that have happened in our love lives specifically over the holidays.
I could go on and on with different stories to explain myself, but these relatable moments about love as told by these 7 popular holiday episodes should do the trick.
Riverdale’s “Silent Night, Deadly Night” Sometimes telling someone you love them can be the ultimate nerve-wracking experience. You may find that even if the one you love tells you first that they love you, you'll still find that those words are hard to express until the perfect setting and time arises. As seen in the clip, Veronica uses a simplistic gesture to tell Archie those special three, groundbreaking words.
The Office’s “Christmas Party” Jim giving Pam a special teapot for Christmas came in 5th (3:28-4:13) on MsMojo's video of their cutest moments.
The aspect of Jim's preparation that a lot of people may resonate with is that when it comes to the holidays, we do our best to find the people we love the perfect gifts. Some of us may spend hours online or in stores finding the most expensive material goods for our loved ones and others take Jim's approach and spend a lot of time coming up with something creative and original such as a teapot full of their inside jokes.
That 70s Show’s “Hyde’s Christmas Rager” Being single during the holidays sucks sometimes. You may not even be the type of person who finds themselves in and out of relationships much, but having that special someone during the holiday season definitely ads some spice to the festivities.
Jackie Burkhart explains it best that even when you're completely in love with yourself, sometimes you just want to french kiss someone underneath the mistletoe to fulfill the loneliness. Gossip Girl’s “Roman Holiday” Serena went above and beyond to find a Christmas-themed way to have sex with Dan for the first time.
Though a lot of us haven't thought about completely transforming an empty room into the Christmas fantasy setting for sexy time, we have rushed to Victoria's Secret to find ourselves or our partner's the best Christmas lingerie we can find to make sex all the more festive.
Glee’s “A Very Glee Christmas” People tend to focus on the highs of love during the holidays while ignoring the down-side. Anyone who has ever had a breakup around Christmas-time can attest to the fact that it overshadows all of the gifts and family time because the only two things you want to do is cry or try to get them back.
Rachel's attempt to shop for Christmas trees with her off and on boyfriend, Finn, backfires when he finally sets the record straight and officially dumps her, leaving her heartbroken.
The OC’s “The Countdown” The OC's New Years episode is the perfect representation of when your New Years kiss is either romantic and everything you've ever wanted or the exact opposite.
This classic scene shows Ryan rushing to Marissa as she patiently and anxiously waits for him all night at a party.
When he finally shows up just before the clock strikes midnight, they share a passionate kiss to start the brand new year. On the other hand, Summer, Marissa's best friend, isn't so lucky.
Summer ends up kissing a random guy at the party, but she quickly realizes that the person she truly wants is her ex-boyfriend, Seth Cohen. Friends’ “The One With All The Resolutions” Chandler and Monica want to have the perfect New Years kiss, but because of the secrecy of their relationship, they let Joey concoct a plan to make it happen for them in a covert way.
Though the holidays may sound like the best excuse to go public with your relationship, it's still not the nest time for some people for multiple reasons. In Chandler and Monica's case, it's because they are all in the same friend group and they don't want to make things awkward. In the case of others, it could simply be that you're not ready for your family to be in your business about that yet or you don't want to put too much pressure on the relationship before it has a chance to bloom.
Either way, we can only hope that things work out for our favor in the end just like it did for Chandler and Monica. We all want to know the answer to this question. When you first get together with someone new, everything is bright and shiny and exciting. But then, something about a past relationship comes up and suddenly you feel caught. You don't know how much you should say and how much you need to keep to yourself. Some romantic partners come off as really jealous and possessive, which might force you to maybe withhold more information than you intended too.
Others seem to want to know every little detail. Navigating this is hard, and unfortunately, there's no way around it. So, how much do you tell your partner about your past loves? The answer is really more simple than we think. You tell them only as much as you're comfortable with. That's it. That's the answer.
No relationship can work without trust, and when it comes to spilling out all of the secrets and memories of previous relationships, that's not always the easiest thing to do. The best solution is to take your time and tell them what you want to tell them when you feel as though the time is right. There is no need to force the conversation, and you should never let your partner force you into telling them anything.
In a previous relationship, I was with someone who came off as sweet and charming but was really insecure. He demanded to know every little detail of what had happened with the boyfriend before him, even though there was about a year in between the two relationships.
His prying and forcefulness actually broke us up. Though we ended up getting back together, it was hard to forget the uncomfortable feeling that I got whenever he said my ex's name and asked questions. He made it almost impossible to share and I actually started to feel ashamed of my memories. So I started giving vague details and keeping the rest to myself. In all honesty, I no longer felt like sharing. Every time he would ask another question and a new minuscule detail would come up, he would jump at me and tell me that I had lied to him, that I wasn't being entirely honest.
It was terrible, and it just about broke my trust in our relationship. That's just not the way that things should be. You tell what you're okay with talking about. When talking to someone who loves and respects you, the words will flow in their own time. Now, I have no problem telling my significant other stories about who I was with. He trusts that I will tell him what he needs to know and now we just laugh about it. When you tell someone that respects you, it makes a world of difference.
There is no more feeling uncomfortable or like you have anything that you need to hide because at the end of the day, they are your memories. What happened in the past, is the past and there's no reason to ever let that hinder your future.
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