Is it wrong to date your ex's best friend? I am in love with my friend's ex boyfriend. Is it acceptable to date the ex? How do I deal with my ex-boyfriend and ex-best friend dating? Am I just a friend to my ex boyfriend or does he like me? Can I be friends with my ex boyfriend? Ask New Question I would wait a short while before asking out the ex, just so it wouldn’t appear that I had anything to do with the break-up, or that I was waiting eagerly in the wings for “my turn”. And I would be sensitive if my friend was deeply hurt. But after a short period, nobody should feel constrained, and no one should be “hands-off”, because of who they have dated in the past. It just isn’t any of their business anymore - they are history. 35 Views. by Quora for Business.
The Girl Code states that you should NEVER date your best friend’s ex. But, every rule has an exception. What if you and he develop a relationship many years after he and your bestie broke up? The rule just wouldn’t make sense then, right?
But, what if your bestie tells you that she still has strong feelings for him despite having broken up years ago? What would you do then? We know it’s tough and we understand your pain. So, if you’re in this boat now and you’re wondering how to sail the seas smoothly, here’s how you know when dating your best friend’s ex-boyfriend is a no and when it’s a go.
Dating your best friend’s ex-boyfriend is a NO when: He cheated on your best friend. If his infidelity is the reason why their relationship came to an end, forget about the guy. If he cheated on your closest friend, who says he won’t do the same thing to you? You can’t prove that he’s a changed man.
Lastly, losing a friend you’ve been with for years. Their breakup was very recent. Maybe you had a secret thing for this guy already even when he and your best friend were still together, and now that they parted ways, you think there’s a chance for the two of you.
While that may be possible, it’s important that you wait. Wait for your friend to heal and move on. You don’t want her thinking that you were just waiting for them to break up and, now that it has happened, you’ll jump on her ex-boyfriend without caring how that will make her feel. Their breakup was messy. If they didn’t part ways amicably, they may still have unresolved issues. They might get back together when things have settled down a bit or they might hate each other forever. Whatever the situation, don’t date your best friend’s former man.
If you do, you’ll just add insult to injury. At the very least, you should wait and see what happens to their relationship and then decide what to do. She’s not over him yet.
You know your best friend is when she reacts badly to the mention of his name. If remembering him pushes her to tears or makes her explode, it means the wounds are still fresh, so you should respect her and give her time to move on. Dating your best friend’s ex-boyfriend is a GO when: Their breakup was mutual and there were no hard feelings. If they both decided to end the relationship because it was not working for them, and you know there aren’t any hard feelings between them, then it’s a good sign.
Your best friend may not mind if you date her ex-boyfriend. Just be sure to let her know about your intentions and see how she reacts. If she does not flip out on you, it’s a go! It has been a long time since they broke up.
If it’s been several months or even a year since they went their separate ways, then you’ve probably waited enough time for your best friend to heal. They remained friends after the breakup. While people seldom stay friends with their former partners (it’s another tricky thing), if they’re both in other relationships and are now happy and content, your best friend may not care about you dating her ex-boyfriend.
This is the best situation and one where jealousy and awkward feelings rarely occur. So, go ahead and ask your bestie for her blessing. She’s moved on from him. If your BFF is already in a committed relationship, one where you see that she’s happy and serious, that means she’s moved on.
Talk to her and confide about how you feel; if she really is your best friend, she will understand your dilemma. She will appreciate your honesty, having waited for the perfect time and respecting her situation. She’ll surely give you the green light to date her ex after your heart-to-heart talk.
Now that you have clear guidelines on when it’s alright to date your best friend’s ex-boyfriend, use your best judgment when making a decision. Always proceed with caution and love. We hope you not only get the guy but, more importantly, you keep your best friend’s friendship and love.
Have you ever loved an ex of your best friend? How did it go for you? Do you have any additional tips and advice for other women in this situation? Share your thoughts and words of wisdom in the comments!
best dating just friends ex boyfriend - Dating My Ex
Hi, I’d consider myself a very loyal, respectful and honest person. Quick background story. My ex-boyfriend of 7 years (high school sweet hearts) and I broke up in March of this year. The past few years were definitely a struggle. Fighting all the time, lack of respect and it kept getting worse.
He ended the relationship because I stopped having sex with him and doing all of the extra kind gestures because I was not being stimulated mentally. Anyhow, things got real nasty toward the end. He called me names and made me feel very bad about myself. It hurt really badly, but I am a strong person and have learned not to dwell on people who are not supportive of me. About a month after the breakup, his best friend and I got into contact and it started out as an occasional text here and there.
Then we started hanging out a bit. Never spoke much about the relationship, it’s his best friend. He let me know I could talk to him if I needed to.
He never spoke about my ex to me. We had very stimulating conversations about goals, life, etc. We are very like-minded. I support him and he supports me. We are two different people but in a sense, we complete one another. I am the free flowing light that he needs. He is my grounding and logical thinker that I need. It is now September and over the summer we’ve grown to really connect with one another.
We text regularly. We do have sex, great sex! Passionate, he cares about my needs, as I care about his. It feels so natural.
I’ve never had to try with him. We can hang out at home with no TV and be completed content just talking with each other. Not even having sex. We are seeing each other but can’t make it known given the circumstances.
I know socially I may be a bad person. But when we’re together nothing else really matters to me. We get lost with each other. That’s what makes me feel like this is different.
Months have flown and everything just happened. I didn’t mean for it too and neither did he. He feels bad that he can’t tell his best friend because he’ll absolutely flip! He’s just that kind of person. But his friend and I have NEVER had those kinds of feelings while my ex and I were together. I never thought in a million years that he would be attracted to me.
It all happened way after the breakup. I guess I need some advice on how I should handle this situation? I like him so much. He cares about me genuinely and I’d feel like a fool if I missed out on this potential love. But I do feel like a bad person because I don’t hide anything from anyone. And I just cannot be upfront with anyone about this.
The longer you keep this a secret the worse it will be. Tell your new boyfriend to reveal what has happened to his friend (your ex). If you keep lying about it then you will both be perceived as the bad guys. Honesty is the best way forward here. Your ex can handle it if you are also nice to him.
Maybe a letter? Thanks Beth. I agree that honesty is key. I’ve thought about that. But he truly does not have the best track record with handling tough situations. He has a temper and I know this will ultimately result in him despising us both. A normal mature man may have the mental capacity to handle such news. My ex however, we know will not take it well at all. They have been friends for 14 years! My boyfriend does not want to ruin his relationship with his longtime friend.
Our energies are just to let each other go. I hear you Jo but your ex has to learn to deal with this type of situation. This will be very helpful as a life lesson as long as you are both kind to him. Expect a storm, but weather it. He will come around. You were with him for 7 years so even if he wasn’t a bad tempered person this would be tough.
Always imagine the situation in reverse, him going out with your best friend. It’s not easy even for a mild mannered person. He will feel betrayed. So just dampen his anger with understanding. Don’t look for a victory.
In the end he may even hang out with you guys. Hi Jo, Just be careful, I have done the same thing previously. I was with someone for 3 years and after we broke up, a few months later I was with his best friend. Be careful, and break it to everyone as gently as possible.
When we told everyone, everyone hated us. To the point where I left him (the best friend) because I could see how badly it was hurting him to lose his friends.
“I thrust Sophie into a corner, blocking her with my body. She panted and snagged her lower lip in her teeth. "This is not my life," she insisted. I looked at her solemnly. "Im afraid it is. But it doesnt have to be for long. Lets just get through this. Then things go back to normal for you." "Like they keep going back to normal for you?" Sophie hissed.
"Ghost of your mother, psycho ex-best friend, company agent dating your dad, psychic vampire ex-boyfriend, werewolf current boyfriend—by the way, I cant blame you for that one," she confessed, eyes round as she mouthed the word whoa before continuing with her list, "Trip to the asylum, attempts against your life, vigilante father ... " "Hey, the last ones are brand new.
And the vigilante father thing? Hell revert." "Anyhow, Im not so keen on your concept of normal." I caught her staring at me. ” — Shannon Delany — report this ad “I thrust Sophie into a corner, blocking her with my body.
She panted and snagged her lower lip in her teeth. "This is not my life," she insisted. I looked at her solemnly. "I'm afraid it is. But it doesn't have to be for long. Let's just get through this. Then things go back to normal for you." "Like they keep going back to normal for you?" Sophie hissed.
"Ghost of your mother, psycho ex-best friend, company agent dating your dad, psychic vampire ex-boyfriend, werewolf current boyfriend-by the way, I can't blame you for that one," she confessed, eyes round as she mouthed the word whoa before continuing with her list, "Trip to the asylum, attempts against your life, vigilante father ... " "Hey, the last ones are brand new. And the vigilante father thing? He'll revert." "Anyhow, I'm not so keen on your concept of normal." I caught her staring at me.
” — Shannon Delany Friend Dating Ex Boyfriend Quotes Pictures Want to see more pictures of Friend Dating Ex Boyfriend quotes? Click on image of Friend Dating Ex Boyfriend quotes to view full size.
report this ad Related Famous Quotes by Topics • “Balancing our energy portfolio is a real chance to reduce energy bills, revitalize rural America, slow global warming and strengthen our energy security.
” — Tom Udall • “I must go the aunts will be worried. Guy, I dont know if we will meet again, but " Her voice broke and ” — Eva Ibbotson • “This journey then, is nothing more, yet nothing less than a period of acclimating to a new way of seeing, a time of ” — Bernadette Roberts • “Standing before you as the advocate of the lower races, I declare what I believe cannot be gainsaid ...
that just so soon ” — George Thorndike Angell • “Just watching peoples ability to adapt, especially young peoples, inspires me to accept more in life instead of wishing things were different all ” — Rhea Seehorn • “Good parenting, from my perspective, is like building a three-foot retaining wall against a four-foot wave.
The kids have to make up that ” — Greg Gutfeld • “You dont have to go to church and sit in a pew to find faith. Look into the eyes of a newborn baby ” — Greever Williams • “When one is young, one venerates and despises without that art of nuances which constitutes the best gain of life, and it is ” — Friedrich Nietzsche • “The key to happiness is having dreams and the key to success is fulfilling those dreams.and eventually one day well die, just like ” — Jeb Corliss • “Mind can never be intelligent - only no-mind is intelligent.
Only no-mind is original and radical. Only no-mind is revolutionary - revolution in ” — Rajneesh • “Clary knew shed never be able to pull off that sort of elegance in a million years, and she didnt care. Isabelle was ” — Cassandra Clare • “They can romanticize us so, mirrors, and that is their secret: what a subtle torture it would be to destroy all the mirrors ” — Truman Capote • “I totally let myself indulge, but I make little deals with myself.
If I have an extra cupcake, Ill run a couple of ” — Megan Hilty • “And so you, like the others, would play your brains against mine. You would help these men to hunt me and frustrate me ” — Bram Stoker • “I realize that it is an unpopular and unhumanitarian position, for which I have been excoriated by liberal colleagues, but I think Plessy ” — William Rehnquist
Is Dating A Friend's Ex Really Such A Big No-No?