In the world of online dating it’s perfectly acceptable to be dating more than one person at a time. Once a strong connection is developed couples will usually become exclusive. But what if you develop a deep affection for two people and can’t choose between them? The reality is that different people will be attractive to you and each will bring unique things to a relationship A good way to help you find out what you should do when you believe you love two people is to imagine yourself in the shoes of one of your partners. How would it feel to imagine them in the arms of someone else? How would you respond if they presented it to you as a reasonable situation?
more than one guy at a time is definitely a confidence booster, but it's also hard work (oh, life is so tough, right?). Don't struggle with the juggle—we've rounded up a few ladies who have been there and done that to tell you exactly how to handle the tricky situations that come with playing the field.
"I was previously married for about six years and didn't really take the time to consider what I wanted out of a relationship or marriage," says Megan, 27. "Now with dating more than one guy, I have been able to look at what each of them would add to my life and not feel pressured about one person. I can stay more objective until I make a decision about which situation and person better suits me, and vice versa." Learn from 24-year-old Dani's dating mistake: "In my most recent relationship with a guy, we were very up front and honest about dating others, so much so that we talked with each other about our other dates," she says.
"That's where things started to get messy. I realized that although I was OK with the thought of him dating other women, I wasn't actually OK with hearing about it. That brought on unwanted jealousy." Dating multiple men makes for a very high probability of getting busted, says Becky, 29. "Last St. Patrick's Day I went to happy hour in the afternoon with one guy I was dating, and then I made an excuse and met up with my other guy. When I was walking to the bar, my afternoon date drove past and saw me with the other guy.
He stopped and called me out on it, and I ended up losing both guys." • The risk of getting caught, however, can be part of the excitement of dating more than one guy. "I think I was so caught up in the game' of it all that being with just one guy almost seemed too monotonous for me," says Becky. "Whenever I really liked a guy and would date just him, it wouldn't seem like enough. It's now created a fantasy land that probably doesn't exist, but I hold on to the hope that somebody out there has it all." • Knowing why you're playing the field can help you keep things in perspective.
Forty-one-year-old Michelle made it a point to date more than one man after her divorce. "I didn't want to get attached to one person and risk getting hurt on top of the hurt I was already dealing with, or risk someone keeping me from leaving," she says.
"When one of the guys I was dating decided he didn't want to date me anymore, or there was something about him that I didn't like, it was easy to let him go." • Just because you're content with the way things are doesn't mean your multiple men are.
Make a point to touch base periodically. "I'm dating two guys right now, and I'm trying to let things sift out on their own while keeping a degree of neutrality," says Megan.
"But I try to progress things a bit by asking questions such as To you, what is going on between us?'" This advice sounds like common sense but can be surprisingly difficult when you're in the moment.
"I remember one guy I dated that I really liked and felt we had a lot in common, but my lack of full interest in him ran him off," says Michelle. "In the end, what I really want is to be with that special someone and have a committed, monogamous relationship." • • • • • • © 2018 Condé Nast. All rights reserved.
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best dating more than one woman at a time - Baisez des femmes de votre région ce soir
Date More than One Man at a Time Emotionally, how can I date more than one man at a time? Hi Ronnie The Dating Coach, A good friend of mine is taking your Monday night teleclass and really enjoying it.
We were talking the other day about your advice to date more than one man at a time. That would be fine for the first few dates, but we couldn’t figure out how to do it once we found someone we were interested in. Wouldn’t that become logistically and emotionally complicated? We are in our 60’s and noticing lots of single men in our age bracket, much to our surprise!
We’d love your advice on this please. –Sixty and Sassy Dear Sixty and Sassy, Great question! Let me make an important distinction to help you understand the situation better. Dating is not the same as being in a relationship. My recommendation is not to get emotionally attached quickly because some men disappear and never call again. It’s hard to know which kind of man you are dating without a series of dates. While you may have 4-10 dates with one man, that does not mean you are in a relationship with him.
And you are not dating exclusively until you have that discussion. This is a very common mistake in thinking that so may women make. You are not in a relationship until you know you have a standing date on a Saturday night (depending on work schedules of course) without discussing it. When you just know you’ll see him Saturday night – then you’re in the first phase of relationship. How long this takes varies from couple to couple.
What I found both personally and with my dating coaching clients over the past 10 years is that many men simply disappear before you ever get to the first phase of relationship. Sometimes you only get one, two or three dates and then poof! He’s gone because he has opted out for any number of reasons. Or you might decide the man is not right for you and end things. This is perfectly normal because dating is about getting to know someone to decide whether or not you want to spend more time together.
I call this phase “data gathering” and make a joke about how that is the origin of the word “dating.” “Dat” comes from – data and “ing” from gathering.
When dating, you are in the process of discovering if the two of you: • Can have fun together • Understand each other’s sense of humor • Enjoy some of the same things • Have a similar world view • Live with the same value system • Carry a conversation easily, etc.
Stay neutral as long as possible You want to stay as objective as possible at this point, especially for online dating. Yes, you may be excited and have feelings starting to build. But the longer you remain sort of neutral, the less likely you’ll go through those short but painful heart breaks if things don’t work out. On the other hand, I agree it would be hard to be in a relationship with two different men.
But that is not what I am suggesting at all! Don’t focus on one man right away Lastly, I don’t think you should decide to focus on one man until you get the idea from him that he wants to focus on you. And even then you might be cutting yourself short if you decide this too quickly.
Keeping your options open until you get to at least date six is just a smart thing to do so you don’t feel like you are always starting over if things don’t work out. I personally dated 30 men in one year, dating several of them at the same time. (One time I was dating three guys named John!) I never knew which guy would call again so I dated as many men as asked me out if I was interested in them. Do you see what I mean?
Don’t put all your eggs in “one basket” if you get my drift. Many of your dates won’t pan out which is what makes dating more than one man possible.
Some stick around, some disappear making room for new ones pop in. I hope this has cleared up some confusion for you about dating more than one man at a time.
Basically, it helps you hedge your bets as they say. Have fun out there and enjoy those men! Wishing you love, Ronnie Photo Credit: Here’s what to read next • • • • • One response on “ How to Date More than One Man at a Time” • Jo Hi Ronnie, You’ve added just enough to this response to make it even more helpful than the one you sent to me. Thank you! I really like the part about “data gathering” and “dating.” The list of types of data to gather was great, and I’d love to see more.
I have your book, MANifesting Mr. Right. Is that information in the book? It’s been a long time since I’ve read it. Maybe it’s about time to read it again!
In my opinion you should tell those women "before" you meet them that you are dating other people.. Also allow any woman your seeing to see other guys too..Play fair..The only reason women would get mad is because your not telling them in the beginning on the phone first.
If you dont want anything serious you should let people know..not mislead them. How would you feel if you found someone you really wanted a relationship with and found out behind your back they are "having sex" with another guy?
No one wants to fall in love with a "player".. Hi Everybody, . . . , . .i was just passing by, . . .and heard ya talkin, . . I might be a little different,(in a good way), from most folks, . . but, . . with my limited "single life" experience, . . . I have always done things my way, . . and maybe honesty, sometimes, .
. to extremes, . .(too much) . . so I kinda, have always introduced, . . most of my little women "too each other", . . and in 2006 went out to dinner, with several, . . at the same time, . . .ok?,. . A couple of the group meetings, . . is gonna be in my future blogs, . . ok? PS: you may think, i'm a little nuts, .
.(that's ok), . . but I also, sometimes, . . . introduce future little women, . . to my ex wife sometimes, . . . . Sweet Darlin Frenchie, . . You are definitely and undeniably Right, . . but, . . .there isn't much I can do about it, . . . and by the way, . . .I had a GREAT time talkin to you last night in person, . . and now i can state for a Fact, . . . . that there is indeed , . . a very beautiful woman, with a very beautiful heart, . . working her Beautiful little butt off, .
. .over in France, . . . . There is not a thing wrong with dating more than one person. If you meet that "someone" and you BOTH decide to be exclusive, then that ends multiple dating.
But isn't the purpose of this site to date? @remo58, you are on the right track. You can't catch a fish if you don't throw the line. But you don't need to let the other person know you have another date!
I don't want to hear about your next date any more than I want to hear about your ex. If we hit it off, then we would discuss if you are making any more dates with other people. I just had dinner with several female friends and the topic of my online dating was discussed at length.
They don't see anything wrong with dating multiple people either. They know you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince. The problem is there are so damn many frogs. Whats wrong with that is that most men want the women to be loyal to him and they also lie and dont' tell all the women.
If the women are also sleeping around and know about ALL the women you are with then I dont see a problem. It's pretty dysfunctional but that's your show; as long as you are honest to all the women. Would YOU like to post a blog on Connecting Singles? Would YOU like to post a blog on Connecting Singles? Have you written blogs that you'd like to share with other members? Posting your blogs shows your skill and creativity and helps members get to know you better.
Your blog will appear on the Connecting Singles and also in a link on your profile page.
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