Best dating someone hiv undetectable meaning

best dating someone hiv undetectable meaning

It looked at 900 HIV-discordant couples—meaning one partner was living with HIV (undetectable and on antiretroviral therapy [ART]) and the other was negative. From September of 2010 to May of 2014, these participating couples provided detailed sexual diaries, accompanied by routine examinations, which produced a wealth of data that was analyzed, synthesized and then published These results were saying that the risk of transmitting HIV from someone who was living with the virus and on treatment to a negative partner was negligible to non-existent. I had to dig deeper. We had information coming [into the PARTNER study] that there was no risk, but the data was weak, Lundgren says. The impetus for the study was the Swiss statement.

best dating someone hiv undetectable meaning

No one’s ready for the news that they are HIV positive. I remember where I was. The doctor was a stern-faced woman with blonde hair and a golden cross dangling around her neck. She said “HIV” slowly, with a deep Southern drawl. I was living in Savannah, Georgia, and completing my last year of college. I was in the clinic for several hours, thumbing through informational pamphlets on the coffee table in the little counseling room. One wall was exposed brick — très chic for a place I never wanted to be, a place I would never forget.

I remember all of it: the glass coffee table, the cross, and the way she said “yeah” when I asked her, “Is it HIV?” She nodded, crossing her legs. She had done this before and knew it was better to have no preamble, no bullshit: “Yeah, it’s HIV.” Over the next six months, I became very depressed. But eventually, the fog lifted, thanks primarily to sex. I had a few dates, a few good hookups. I discovered I still had a sexual being in me, and that I could still have an awesome sex life.

I started medication and got to a healthy place. Today, I have no fear of my HIV. It’s part of me, a part that has connected me with sexy and powerful queer people.

The unity between those of us who share this disease is unbreakable. We are activists and politicians, performers and artists, porn stars and proud sluts. My best sex came post-diagnosis, along with my best partners.

Life didn’t stop. You’ll get there. To help you on your journey, here are six answers to your basic HIV questions, with six more to come in part two of this guide. Will anyone want to have sex with me now that I am HIV positive? Yes, they will. I was 21 when I tested positive. I was not confident in sex, and had only started exploring my newfound kinks. Suddenly I was branded with something I was deeply afraid of, something I had been afraid of for years.

I assumed everyone else would be equally afraid of it. I assumed everyone would be afraid of me. Today, my sex life is better than it ever was before my diagnosis. I’ve had two wonderful boyfriends since testing positive, and both of them are HIV negative. Life isn’t always easy, but I can say confidently that HIV has not stopped me from meeting and dating and fucking sexy people. I use it as a litmus test to weed out unwanted partners: If you’re not cool with my status, you don’t get the rest of me.

How do I tell people I want to have sex with that I am HIV positive? The standard practice in the United States is to get HIV positive people on medication as soon as possible. The sooner you start meds and take them diligently (meaning every day), the sooner you will become undetectable. People with an undetectable viral load — I’ll explain what that means in the next question — are .

In the medical community, this practice is called “Treatment As Prevention,” or TasP. Effective HIV treatment prevents the spread of HIV. Until you are undetectable, you are infectious, which means you are able to transmit the virus. Some people wait until they’re undetectable before having sex again.

Some people don’t. As long as your sex partners know your HIV status and consent to have sex with you, you can have sex. How you disclose this information is up to you. I tell interested people immediately. And discuss with every partner what safer sex practices you want to use.

Safer sex practices include condoms and , the once daily pill that prevents HIV transmission. In the beginning, I felt it was my responsibility to educate potential sex partners who didn’t know all this terminology — guys with no idea what “undetectable” meant. I no longer feel this way. It’s not my responsibility to educate anyone on the modern realities of HIV. A sexually responsible, socially cognizant adult should do that self-education on their own time, particularly if they are part of a community that is at high-risk for HIV (men who have sex with men, particularly men of color, and transgender women).

I can’t have a sex ed tutorial every time I want to get laid. If someone’s not accepting of my HIV status, it’s a dealbreaker. If they want some information about HIV, I’ll gladly send some links. But do they get to have sex with me?

Nope. Ignorance isn’t cute. On all the hookup apps, I write my status (HIV+ and Undetectable) on every profile, and tell interested parties as soon as we start talking. This weeds out poz-phobic (or simply poz-ignorant) people faster. I don’t want to take the time to get invested in someone only to be rejected later. The people who pass this test and embrace my status have ended up being better fuck buds, better hookups, and better relationships than any I had before.

What does “undetectable” mean? You are “undetectable” when the medication you are taking has reduced the amount of HIV in your body to less than 20 copies of the virus per one milliliter of blood.

Compare that number to people who have been recently diagnosed and are not yet taking medication — their tests can show millions of copies of HIV in one millimeter of blood. When you are undetectable, the virus is unable to trigger antibody tests, which are the tests used to tell if someone has HIV.

(Your HIV is unable to be detected by the test — hence, it is “undetectable.”) This is the healthiest you can be without being HIV negative. When you are undetectable, you are unable to transmit the virus.

Let me say that again: You can stay undetectable as long as you keep taking your daily medication. Is there a cure for HIV? No, there is no cure for HIV, at least not right now.

But there are medicines so effective that they’ve been called a “functional cure.” Which is to say: They don’t remove HIV from your body completely, but they reduce it to the point where the virus is so benign that it is untransmittable, and you can live a healthy, normal, happy, sexy life.

Can I date people who are HIV negative? Of course. As long as they are aware of your HIV status and unafraid of it, you can date anyone you want to date — assuming they want to date you, too.

I am in a serodiscordant relationship, which means I am HIV-positive and my partner is HIV-negative. I know countless long-term, happy serodiscordant couples.

Serosorting is the practice of only dating people with the same HIV status as you, whether that’s positive or negative, for health reasons. Today, there are more and better ways to treat and prevent HIV than there were even twenty years ago, so serosorting is rapidly becoming a thing of the past. That said, some people, both HIV positive and HIV negative, choose to serosort.

Will HIV change how I look? If your doctor diagnosed you with AIDS, you may have seen some changes in your body already. Remember: HIV and AIDS are two different things. If HIV is left untreated, in time it will progress to AIDS, or Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome.

Thankfully, we have medications that reduce the level of HIV in your blood to the point that you can live an extremely healthy life (undetectability). If you’re on medication and taking it diligently, you will never have AIDS.

The average lifespan of an HIV positive person on medication is almost exactly the same as an HIV negative person. When you’re undetectable, HIV does not change how you look. You cannot “tell” who has HIV by looking at them. Some of the most attractive people in your neighborhood may have HIV.

Some of the hottest people at your local gay bar have HIV. Many celebrities and models and other public figures very likely have HIV, and are choosing not to be public about their status. Get the best of what's queer. • • • © 2018 Condé Nast. All rights reserved. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our (updated 5/25/18) and (updated 5/25/18) and them. may earn a portion of sales from products that are purchased through our site as part of our Affiliate Partnerships with retailers.

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best dating someone hiv undetectable meaning

best dating someone hiv undetectable meaning - Dating Someone Who's HIV Positive? 7 Questions You Should Know The Answer To, Explained


best dating someone hiv undetectable meaning

U=U Campaign HIV Undetectable What does HIV undetectable mean? Can I get HIV from someone undetectable? What is the risk of sex with someone undetectable? WHAT DOES UNDETECTABLE EVEN MEAN? It means that the traces of the virus are so low that modern medical “tests can not find” HIV. It does not mean cured. It means not detectable. A viral load test is a lab test that measures the number of HIV virus particles in a milliliter of your blood.

These particles are called “copies.” So, when someone says that they are undetectable, it literally means that they have reached a point of which their virus is not detectable by modern lab tests and they are not going to transmit HIV to sexual partner. OK. WHAT IS A VIRAL LOAD? According to , “The term “viral load” refers to the amount of HIV in a sample of your blood. When your viral load is high, you have more HIV in your body, and that means your immune system is not fighting HIV as well.” SO, SOMEONE THAT TAKES MEDICINE SHOULD BE UNDETECTABLE?

Yes, that is the goal of taking medicine called: antiretroviral therapy (ART – treatment with HIV medicines). Those living with HIV take this medicine to control the virus. Now, there are times that treatment failure happens for a small number of individuals living with HIV– but they are generally switched to an different drug to help reach that controlled viral load. It takes time to reach that undetectable result– experts say at least 6 months of undetectable levels is important.

However, there is an almost immediate reduction in the viral load and infectiousness of someone as soon as they begin therapy.

CAN YOU GET HIV FROM SOMEONE THAT IS UNDETECTABLE? First, we have no confirmed transmissions of HIV from someone undetectable to another person during sex in the history of the epidemic. Not one. As of August 10, 2016, : “HIV /AIDS experts from the U.S., Australia, Denmark and Switzerland–including Dr.

Demetre Daskalakis, Assistant Commissioner for the Bureau of HIV/AIDS at the New York City Health Department — endorsed a consensus statement concluding “negligible risk” of HIV transmission from a person with HIV who is on antiretroviral therapy (ART) and has had a consistently undetectable viral load for six months and beyond.” Dr.

Myron Cohen, chief of the Division of Infectious Diseases at UNC School of Medicine and the Principal Investigator of HPTN 052 the first landmark clinical study on the subject said, “I’m pleased that Dr. Daskalakis and the NYC Health Department joined the consensus on the dual benefits of early treatment to protect the health of people with HIV and prevent HIV transmission to their sexual partners.

We hope that bringing the leading experts together will clear up mixed messages about the subject”. Here’s the consensus statement: People living with HIV on [antiretroviral therapy] with an undetectable viral load in their blood have a negligible risk of sexual transmission of HIV. Depending on the drugs employed it may take as long as six months for the viral load to become undetectable. Continued and reliable HIV suppression requires selection of appropriate agents and excellent adherence to treatment.

HIV viral suppression should be monitored to assure both personal health and public health benefits. The consensus statement was endorsed by principal investigators and experts from each of the leading studies that examined this issue included Dr. Jens Lundgren (PARTNER study; University of Copenhagen, Denmark), Dr. Andrew Grulich (Opposites Attract study; University of New South Wales, Australia); and Dr.

Pietro Vernazza (PARTNER study; Swiss statement; Cantonal Hospital,St. Gallen, Switzerland). But, there are many other choices you can make as well to remain HIV negative including using condoms correctly EVERY SINGLE TIME you have sex, taking , and/or choosing other activities instead of sex. There are always new national and international organizations signing the consensus statement including UNAIDS during IAS 2017.

To read the most accurate list of signees and supporters, visit Prevention Access Campaign’s website. Finally, website information from major health information websites like Healthline.com may have outdated or information not consistent with the lastest science, these publications are generally medically reviewed by physicians that may not be specialists in the field of HIV and research. Always note the published date on these articles and feel free to ask me questions about any article that may be outdated.

IF I HAVE SEX WITH SOMEONE UNDETECTABLE AND I AM NEGATIVE, WILL I STILL BE NEGATIVE AFTER HAVING SEX WITH THEM? If they are undetectable for six months on meds, they are not infectious and are not a real risk of transmission to you during sex. *I am not a doctor or medical expert, however, this content is accredited as being health accurate by a third-party.

. Resources: , POZ.com Released 08.12.2016. Accessed 08.15.2016. , NIAID.NIH.gov Released 07.20.2016. Accessed 08.15.2016. , POZ.com Released 07.26.2014. Accessed 08.15.2016. , POZ.com Released 03.05.2014. Accessed 08.15.2016. , imstilljosh.com Released 04.30.2014. Access 08.15.2016.

————— Disclaimer: The information provided on imstilljosh.com is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between a patient and his/her own physician.

This website is not intended for those under the age of 13. Also, guest contributors to this website are not paid, and unless otherwise noted, are not considered experts in their field. They are volunteers. HIV Stories / Symptoms HIV Stories / Symptoms Josh Robbins publishes this popular HIV blog as a hub for his social media activity and activism.

Think of this space as a gathering place for all the conversations he has all over social media. Please remember, Josh is not a doctor, therapist and can't make individual health recommendations for you. This blog is award-winning, health accurate, and nationally mentioned by leading national media outlets including: ABC News, Yahoo!, Huffington Post, MSlisaSays.com, Healthline, MTV Voices, Staying Alive Campaign, Tennessee Department of Health and more.

But, Josh is NOT a physician. This blog is also an independent voice of Josh Robbins. It is not owned by any pharma or health company. - This site complies with the information:


best dating someone hiv undetectable meaning

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